I'M DOING FINE WITH OUT YOU

I’M DOING FINE WITH OUT YOU

BY: Tiffany Wasson

September 30, 2015

I remember sitting within a cage inside my mind.

When you tried to convince me I had to stay within this bind.

You did your best throwing relentless darts at every side.

Chains wrapped around me, I had no fight left inside.

I believed that this was my life and forever I would stay.

You tried your best to convince me that there was no other way.

You lied to me, but to me it seemed like nothing but the truth.

You wicked wolf hiding within sheep skin steeling away my youth…

When God was my Warrior fighting for me all the more

The Holy Spirit spoke more loudly, the truth to my core.

When Jesus became everything and rescued me mightily.

I was unstoppable with the light inside shinning brightly.

I thought that I was lost and never again would I return.

But once again I am set free and for Him I will forever yearn.

See, God has brought me back with all His power and His grace.

Now, I long for His love even more and to rest in His embrace.

Devil you thought that you had me, and thought you had won.

But Jesus came to earth and He made sure that ALL was done.

Standing over you, lifting His leg, indeed He crushed your head.

To send you back to hell with all of the other spiritually dead.

See, Satan you belong in that home where you will forever stay.

So, you might as well just move on and go back to hell today.

The Savior is in my sight and He keeps me safe from your spear.
Satan you no longer phase me, and honestly, I’m doing fine with out you…here.

When God Calls a CONTROL FREAK!

     My youngest son has a lot of favorite things in his four year old life such as Spider-Man, cookies, and thankfully one of my favorites...Wizard of Oz. One thing that seems to trump all of his favorites lately though is playing hide-n-go seek. Now, I'm not talking about your typical game of hide-go-seeking where one person counts and the other person hides wherever they want. His version of gaming goes something like this, "Mom, you go in my room and count to ten and I will go hide in your bed, then you will come get me, OK!"

     When he goes and counts and it's my turn to hide he says the same thing but in reverse of course. Now, being that it's hard for me to follow his rules because I like to hide in my own places...I usually hide somewhere else so that I can surprise him or scare him (yes, I like to scare my kids because it's fun don't judge me). When my youngest finally finds me in my rebel place or I jump out at him to scare him he gets so furious when I'm not in the place he told me to hide.

     Today when I was playing this game with my son the Lord gave me a gentle nudge that I am the exact way with Him. See, when I'm hiding from my son I know where I am. I have a plan of when I want to jump out at him or make him smile with my "surprise" and see his smile go from ear to ear and hear his laughter fill the empty spaces of the room and my heart. Oh how I delight in my child's laughter. 

     Now, I'm not saying that the Lord wants to jump out and scare us but I do think that He wants us to trust Him with the things we can't see. My desire is to tell the Lord, "Ok, Lord I've trusted you now I want you to do this this way, that that way, and show up here with nothing out of line of how I told you to do it." Yeah, I know pretty bold of me or stupid...not sure which but silly none the less because we know we can't tell the Lord to do anything. But I desire this kind of control...even more so when I step out in faith.

     Ever since I put a down payment on the publishing package and submitted my manuscript yesterday I've been freaking out inside because I am literally not in control of the process and what the Lord does with it from here. I don't know exactly who is looking at it, what they will think, and if I will have to re-write the whole book because it needs work and that freaks me out. It makes me scared and a little frustrated to be honest.

     Furthermore, I don't get to know where it will go from here, how God will use it, if He will use it, and the list goes on. Everything in me wants to know what the Lord has hiding around the corners. I know where I want Him to be and how I want everything to pan out...but I don't know...only He knows. But I'm learning the beauty of it all.  That even when I don't know...He has already been where I am going...and even if I'm searching in the wrong direction He will be there to shout "surprise" and hopefully it will be me smiling from ear to ear and Him delighting in His child's laughter! I'm trying to rest in that...that He is in control and He has my best interest in mind...which is really hard for a control freak.

      There was someone in the bible that had to see everything before He trusted the Lord and his name  was given a great meaning behind it "doubting Thomas."

John 20: 24-29 reveals, "But one of the Twelve, Thomas (called “Twin”), was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples kept telling him, “We have seen the Lord!”

But he said to them, “If I don’t see the mark of the nails in His hands, put my finger into the mark of the nails, and put my hand into His side, I will never believe!” After eight days His disciples were indoors again, and Thomas was with them. Even though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them. He said, “Peace to you!” Then He said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and observe My hands. Reach out your hand and put it into My side. Don’t be an unbeliever, but a believer.” Thomas responded to Him, “My Lord and my God!”Jesus said, “Because you have seen Me, you have believed. Those who believe without seeing are blessed.”

     I want with all of my heart to trust the Lord and His plans for me. I'm not going to lie...it is hard sometimes! But He has never given me a reason to not trust Him. Do you find yourself doubting God because of a rough time? Are you nervous because you have put yourself completely out there and you are vulnerable? Friend, just keep the faith in Him. Don't be a doubting Thomas and want to control the situation. Just trust Him. One of the most beautiful quotes I've ever heard goes something like this, "if the Lord wants something to happen it will, if He doesn't it won't, don't try to control the situation...just rest and be faithful." I think that's how it went...I know it's not exact but it's so true! The Lord our faithful Father and we can trust Him! He's such a "good Father!"



http://youtu.be/djrY_eFDOwE

Tiffany

ALL IN

     Just recently our pastor did a series at our church called “ALL IN”. In the beginning of this series I didn’t think that he was talking to me because I felt that I had been obeying Jesus by being “ALL IN”. I thought, “Well, I am writing the book that He is calling me to write so I am being obedient, the pastor isn’t talking to me.” I was totally wrong. Being “ALL IN” with Jesus doesn’t mean that you decide to cannon ball into the waters but decide to just stick your feet in instead…when He calls you or me or anyone…He wants all of us!

     Yes, I had been writing the book that God called me to write, but I was still trying to control the situation. The book IS FINALLY done and I had a plan in my head of how it should pan out to be published. My plan was to finish writing the book and edit it over and over again before anyone touched it to correct it. I wanted a perfect product to hand off to the publisher. Before the publisher got it, I would let a friend read it to give me the approval that it was “publishing worthy”. Then and only then would I set up a KICKSTARTER account to raise the money for the publishing cost. Once I had the approval of someone reading it that it was “publishing worthy” and had “all the money in hand” then I would purchase the package and trust the Lord.  I really was only half way in by trying to control the situation with all of “my plans”.

     My family and I have been challenged to go further, “Cannonball” in, and be “ALL IN”! Instead of trying to go in my “perfect” flawless order, we have taken the gigantic leap of faith. We put a deposit down on a publishing package with Xulon Press to start the process of getting the book published this past Friday. Of course, after I made the purchase, all of the “what if’s” started to flood my mind. What if the book is horrible and doesn’t sell? What if I don’t get the money through kickstarter and my family is left with this financial burden? What if something happens in my family because the enemy is in full force due to our leap of faith? What if, what if, what if? The enemy was having a blast in my mind causing doubt by adding new “what if’s” every minute. I felt as if I was the goalie in a hockey game and that everyone on the ice had countless hockey pucks and were taking shots at me relentlessly. But I had to quit those voices because…I knew and still know that the Lord wants me to do this. I decided to quit putting all of these “stipulations” on what He was calling me too and quit being held back by fear…and let it all go. 

I have learned when it comes to being “ALL IN” with the Lord…

1.     It doesn’t make sense:

a.     When Jesus called His first disciples they were going about their business and trying to catch fish…the way they supported themselves. He called them to leave that all behind and taking nothing with them.

b.     Matthew 4: 18-22, “As He was walking along the Sea of Galilee, He saw two brothers, Simon, who was called Peter, and his brother Andrew. They were casting a net into the sea, since they were fishermen. “Follow Me,” He told them, “and I will make you fish for people!” Immediately they left their nets and followed Him. Going on from there, He saw two other brothers, James the son of Zebedee, and his brother John. They were in a boat with Zebedee their father, mending their nets, and He called them. Immediately they left the boat and their father and followed Him.”

2.     It is a scary thing:

a.     Following Jesus makes you abandon all comfort and to never look back; which to anyone can be scary.

b.     Luke 9: 57-62, “As they were traveling on the road someone said to Him, “I will follow You wherever You go!” Jesus told him, “Foxes have dens, and birds of the sky have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay His head.” Then He said to another, “Follow Me.”

“Lord,” he said, “first let me go bury my father.” But He told him, “Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and spread the news of the kingdom of God.” Another also said, “I will follow You, Lord, but first let me go and say good-bye to those at my house.” But Jesus said to him, “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God.”

3.     It causes you to ask others to follow the crazy journey:

a.     Acts 2 reveals where Peter preaches because he can no longer hold in the awesomeness of the Father and Son of the universe. The Holy Spirit just came down upon them and he preaches to all that are gathered. He proclaims what the prophet Joel has said has come to pass and he further explains what people should do in order to experience Jesus for them. Once he did this they were forgiven of their sins and church grew before his eyes.

b.     Acts 2: 29-40, “Brothers, I can confidently speak to you about the patriarch David: He is both dead and buried, and his tomb is with us to this day. Since he was a prophet, he knew that God had sworn an oath to him to seat one of his descendants on his throne. Seeing this in advance, he spoke concerning the resurrection of the Messiah. He was not left in Hades, and His flesh did not experience decay. “God has resurrected this Jesus. We are all witnesses of this. Therefore, since He has been exalted to the right hand of God and has received from the Father the promised Holy Spirit, He has poured out what you both see and hear. For it was not David who ascended into the heavens, but he himself says, The Lord declared to my Lord, ‘Sit at My right hand until I make Your enemies Your footstool.’ “Therefore let all the house of Israel know with certainty that God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Messiah!” When they heard this, they came under deep conviction and said to Peter and the rest of the apostles: “Brothers, what must we do?” “Repent,” Peter said to them, “and be baptized, each of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. For the promise is for you and for your children, and for all who are far off, as many as the Lord our God will call.” And with many other words he testified and strongly urged them, saying, “Be saved from this corrupt generation!”

4.     Blessings will follow:

a.     Jesus had risen and came to reveal Himself to the disciples for a third time and He blessed them with an abundant feast.

b.     Matthew 21:6-7 “Cast the net on the right side of the boat,” He told them, “and you’ll find some.” So they did, and they were unable to haul it in because of the large number of fish. Therefore the disciple, the one Jesus loved, said to Peter, “It is the Lord!”

5.     He promises to never leave:

a.     Even when He calls us to be “ALL IN” He is “IN” with us!

b.     Hebrews 13: 5, “Your life should be free from the love of money. Be satisfied with what you have, for He Himself has said, I will never leave you or forsake you.”

     So, here I am taking a dive and being “ALL IN” the way Jesus calls me to be. To others it may not make sense and I am scared out of my mind but I am asking you friends to join me on this journey of being “ALL IN” with Jesus…the one worth being all in with! Not only do I believe that God will show up for me in a mighty way but I also know that He will show up for you too if you follow Him through obedience and complete abandonment. He promises to NEVER leave us…He promises to show up for us. QUIET THE VOICES…TAKE THE DIVE!!! YOU WON’T BE SORRY!

 https://youtu.be/hXqXIicm8uU

Because I took the DIVE...I got my first donation for the book yesterday!!! 

GOD IS ALREADY SHOWING UP!!!

TIFFANY